There is a particular kirtan that I have listened to for at least the past 10 years every time I took on a new project or wanted to begin some creative, spiritual, emotional endeavor. It was a constant reminder that the supreme Lord, who I grew up always believing was my dear-most friend was in control and was leading me in everything I did. It was comforting to know that somehow, whatever I was doing was part of a divine plan that was linked back to my best friend. So from midterms, to resumes, to yearly intentions, I would begin each one of them by playing this kirtan.
The kirtan would lead me through whatever it was with a burst of auspiciousness that automatically inspired success. The sweet melody would carry me through whatever stress was bound to come with the project and the beat of the drums would remind me of the excitement that lead me there in the first place.
The kirtan is one that comes full circle and ends just the way it began, which always reminded me that we are going to end this life just the way that we began, connected to the supreme Lord. Somehow, in the middle we tend to forget all of that but the good thing is, just as quickly as beats change it only takes that moment to start the reconnection.
I sat down to plan a kirtan class the other day and realized that I hadn’t listened to that kirtan as the start of an endeavor since I started my labor with my daughter over a year ago. Does that mean that I hadn’t begun any projects since then? No. What it did serve to point out was that my focus had shifted and I had forgotten to connect with the source of all of my inspiration.
I had forgotten to begin everything with that tribute to my dearest friend. Suddenly I began thinking that somehow I was the doer, instead of simply an instrument to be used. I started looking at the results of my actions to provide me with self worth, rather than understanding that I am already worthy, but that the main qualification for that worth comes from maintaining a humble heart and understanding that we can never do anything on our own.
Our greatest achievements come with the help of the teachers who guide us and from the divine being who resides in our hearts.
That awareness of what I was missing was enough to bring to my attention to why all of the stress of my recent projects was beginning to get to me. I needed to reconnect. So now I am shifting back to center. I’ve been playing this kirtan all day since then. When you listen a kirtan enough, it becomes more than just a tune on a cd. It becomes a person. An old friend that you can call up on a good day or a bad one and just talk to. Someone you never have to explain yourself to because they already know you better than you know yourself. Even when you fall, forget or make mistakes, the holy name is all forgiving and is always ready to offer assistance.
Since I’ve talked about it so much, I’ve added a link where you can hear this kirtan for yourself. I hope it puts a smile on your face and a tingle down your spine When you get to the page simply scroll down until you see Prayers to the Dust of Vraja Part 1
I revel in this moment, and I again commit myself to the knowledge that I am not the ultimate boss. I am an instrument to be used to spread the wealth of kirtan, the art of devotion through song, and the divine love that accompanies it. I accept the lessons of my life with a grateful heart and the understanding that everything is happening for my benefit.
Got a kirtan that helps you to re-center and focus? Maybe just one that makes your day…everyday? I’d love to hear your thoughts! Drop me a message, comment or smiley face.